5 Things every Star Wars fan NEEDS in their life.

Edgy January 10, 2018 0
5 Things every Star Wars fan NEEDS in their life.

In the twenty first century there is quite the blur between the words want and need. Often what we say we need is just what we really really really want and what we need something we think we actually need but could probably do with out. Technically speaking if you want something then you have a desire to possess or do something you wish for. Need on the otherhand means you require something because it is essential or very important rather than just desirable.

So when I say if you’re a Star Wars fan, then you NEED these things in your life in order to continue, i don’t know, breathing or remain regular or something like.

X-Wing Knife Block

X-Wings are cool, they look cool when their blasting the bejesus out of an Imperial TIE fighter and they look cool where all the functioning parts have been replaced with knife blades. The set features 5 Stainless Steel blades that are super sharp so if you’re under 18 you arent going to be allowed to buy these.

Each knife is beautifully weighted and crafted from single pieces of steel. The set contains a Chef’s knife, a bread knife, a carving knife, a parring knife and a utility knife. They do require a little bit of maintenence to keep them sharp, but as long as you stay on top if it then they will last a long time. The set requires a small amount of assembly, but this is literally just screwing the X-Wing into the base and can be accomplished with a single Screw Driver and zero expertiese. Don’t worry, the blades aren’t exposed as they are placed through the block, each knife has an individual holder inside the X-Wing body so they arent going to be sticking out all over the place waiting for people to injure themselves.

Storm Trooper Helmet Decanter

If you’re a classy mother like we are, then you dont drink your Cognac straight from the bottle, or your whiskey from the barrell. Like the classy mother hubbards we are we like to decant our alcohol into classy decanters, like posh people off of the 80’s. No more leaving unsightly Jack Daniels bottles on the side, or those pesky Cognac bottles on display. You can now meet your liqor storage needs with this classy Storm Trooper helmet decanter.

If you typically feel the need to consume your hard liquor under the cover of a delightful brown paper bag, then you too can feel no shame as onlookers marvel at your classy decanter. In all seriousness however, drink responsibly and all that but this is cool and we all know it, it looks as cool on a sideboard as crystal carriage clock, as at home on a bar as a Man Times writer and as at home on a kitchen work top as freshly chopped iceberg letuce. You need this, I know it, you know it, so go ahead and click on the picture so you can buy it.

R2D2 Oven Glove


You know oven’s right? They get well hot, or quite hot, depending on the temperature you’ve chosen to set it at, presumably a temperature which is appropriate for what you’ve chosen to cook. The up-shot of all this is that you’re going to need a method to protect your hands from the heat of whatever it is you’ve decided to put in your oven. The typical item to accomplish this risky task is the “Oven Glove” a covering for the hand which is designed to protect the wearer from excesive heat for short periods of time.

Some of these “Oven Gloves” however look like regurgitated excrement and apparently if you want to be awesome as well as protected you need these R2D2 oven gloves, made from 100% luxurious cotton and everything not to mention you get to put your hand in something that looks a little bit like R2D2, who we can all agree is the best character in the whole Star Wars saga.

Star Wars Monopoly

If you have family and friends you dont like anymore and want to get rid of them, then this is the infuriating argument waiting to happen you’ve been searching for. Simply invite the intended target(s) for a game of your shiny new Star Wars Monopoly Game, and let the magic happen. It comes with all new exciting features every Star Wars fan will enjoy, such as a round board, and player pieces that feature people from the films. Spend Credits rather than your local currency, buying properties from the Star Wars universe to dominate or liberate the galaxy depending on your personal bend. So if you ever fancied legendary Star Wars bad guy Darth Vader as a bit of a property developer when he’s not dominating the Galaxy on behalf of an evil Empire then this is the game for you!

Seriously though, and sarcasm aside (as much as possible) board games are actually a great way to kill some time with your family who I’m going to assume you’re strangley fond of, so why not treat yourself and them to something that will allow you all to kill some time together, particualrly during a power cut.

Sphero BB-8

What a Dude this guy is, aside from the fact he might be the best thing about the new Star Wars films you can now own your own little fella to play with or to run around your house and explore. Interact with him through the app or put him in full autonomous mode and let BB-8 go and have his own adventures. Then get him to project his adventures and see what he’s been up to or download them to your PC or phone. This is as cool as it gets, your very own droid, the more you talk to him the more he’ll learn and adapt to your behaviour so your experience with BB-8 is unique. There’s a whole host of other gadgets you can get to play with him, and take your already amazing experience to the next level!

He’s not cheap and some of the accessories are pretty pricy too but all of that is irrelevant becuase he is honestly cool as fun!

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